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How can life turn out so opposite to what you thought it should of being. I don't mean the normal sayings eg well do something about it. Or didn't you see the signs. Or couldn't you see it was going the wrong way.
I often think of Michael Jackson a brilliant artists had all the money in the world had to grow up before he could be a normal child. Doing normal things, he was making money with his family and being famous. He had supposedly friends that loved him. They were rich and powerful some were also child stars grown into fame and all that came with it no privacy, money. If they were really good friends could none of them or family stop him from all that plastic surgery. Doing the planning of a concert that in the end cost him is life. What about theses doctors for the sake of the almighty dollar how can they keep doing those surgeries to him when he didn't need them. He clearly had problems. He didn't see it. The doctors didn't address it.
I supposed I used that because I have had friends that I've have said something before I saw something going to far. I can't with a clear concious not say something or do something to help them. Yes people may say but in the end its there choice and it's none of your business. Isn't that what is all about? if you love someone, friend, family isn't that the natural thing to do. You do what you can, especially if you can see something ending out wrong and becuse your friend or family member is so close to whats happening they may not see the the signs clearly. They might not even not know or see a problem. There're to involved to close the can't see outside the box. Or denile set in and they say they can handle it. Or, yeh no worries i know what I ' m doing and clearly they don't. Do you still standback. Do you just slowly close that friendship off because you don't have the time or your life is going great you don't won't to be around any negativity.
Till the time you are just a spec in time. Watching and trying to figure out how you got so alone and forgotten.
Life and time are passing by as if your on a express train and just watching the scenery pass by frame by frame and there 's no stopping it. You can't go back, you can't stop, nothing seems familiar and your not even sure if anyone is driving and now your wondering is there a destination for you. Is my mistake that I just can't see someone I love go through something. I will help and support them and be there as much as they need me and want me To be. Is it a mistakes still to worry and care for them even if they decided their way was the way wanted to go and it ended badly. Is a stupid of me to still be friends or love them even if it ended as badly as you thought. Or should I punish them by not be friends with theme cause they didn't listen to then. What give the right to anyone to not want to be associated with you for what you didn't didn't do. I mean wasn't that a lesson that had to be learnt.
How do i accept that, for me depending on how bad, or serious what someone has done, or being through and I could live with it spirituality, morally, or it didn't hurt anyone or any animal. It was more they were heading down a self destructive path and any hurt was to them selves. I be the idiot still hanging in there. It might not be the same, I understand that but I would still call, often to say how are you,I'm still here and yr not alone. I know within myself I always think of them and wonder how they are. I'd still try an invite an keep them involved in mylife and another mutual friends we may of had. That's why I called myself idiot cause not one person I've grown up gone through all school years and our small group till slightly after have all kept incontact and and I've found very recently no one has even mention where I am of what happened to me.
What I don't understand is how people you've grown up with, family members,people that you thought would be in your life forever in some form of capacity are not and they don't seem to care or even think of you. I understand peoples lives change and grow but that's no excuse. Now days most people are on face book or Twitter and documenting everything. But haven't got time to give a five minute call or text just to know your there for each other in all good occasions and all bad times through laughter and tears .
By know you've probably guessed I'm taking about me. Well I know I been loyal, trustworthy, stay when everyone abanded ship I've given, so to speak the shirt off my back and I'm still paying that off, to help. Yet no one is around today I've ask many of times in past if and what I did to deserve everyone just forgetting me as if I never existed. But I've gotten that "no nothing all is good "yet no one is around and yet thanks to social media I 've found they have all kept in contact. Even the people that they would of not said two words to each other throughout life but mightof being in one class together. It saddens as even so I tried to friend request it was cancelled straight a way.
Hurt and confused what does it actually mean to love someone, care for them,whether their family, fiends, partners,. Is only do it half way. Don't get to involved, care but not enough to say anything. Delete or just get away from anyone that is heading into trouble a then really leave them way that need you. But when in public always show that affection of oh my I've missed you or you look great I've been meaning to catch up or I've been so busy. Yep with everyone else but you. How do they like themselves.
If I have problem. With someone I go to them. And if I happen not to like you I m surely not going to stop in shopping centre and hi how are you etc.
Is my thinking weird. Do I judge myself and another's to much. Then arnt you supposed to treat people with the same respect you'd like to be treated. Needless to say I've cancelled Facebook and Twitter just to get the inquisitive side of to see what there been up to know.
Thanks for reading this if you want to comment it would be interesting to see keep in mind you only have snippets of of everything and even I think I wrote a lot but I guess it hurt me more than I thought it did. Or I'd luv toured if any similar people have gone through this. Or just say all cool O:)
mystique
24 May 15 7:01 AM
Facebook and twitter can put you in a bad mood, i have deleted people i knew from school ,but why have I got them on their? i don't even have their number, so why should they be apart of my life? there reason is people like to be nosey , some like to gossip , some like to stalk your profile, some like yo befriend you ? all to know what you are up too? but why is the question, here is an answer, it may be wrong.Some people are not happy in their own life and like to see what people get up to so they can gossip. To stay positive its best to keep out the negative, negative can play a big role in your decision making , being influenced by negativity can lead you in the wrong direction , it can set you life back in years. Good luck with what ever you are going through
This is exactly why, in all my years of being on Facebook, I still don't even have 100 'friends'. I don't get how people have hundreds or even thousands. I've had friend requests from people I don't even speak to in the street, so why should they see my private page where I share things with close friends and family. And I have (rarely) added people from my past, but if after a few weeks, they haven't had any active involvement on my page by way of comments or likes, then I delete them again. I'm sorry you've been let down, but sometimes you just have to look after number one, and not worry about anyone else. Real friends don't abandon and/or ignore you